The case against Jack Snyder

“That’s all I can stands, I can’t stands no more!”  You pop culture fans will recognize that line.  It’s taken a herculean effort for me to keep my lunch down at the mere site of ATWT’s Jack and Janet, but yesterday’s episode made it impossible.  I’m a pound lighter, but a whole lot more pissed off as a result of it.

Excuse me, but WHY is it ok for Jack to decide that it’s time for him to play house (as my grandmother us to say) with Janet?  Don’t get me wrong, I have no problem with people in love living together.   It’s not my business.  What I object to with the “Moral Authority” popping the ‘little’ question to Janet, is that he would be the first in line to attack his ex-wife as “shacking up” if she dared to move a man she wasn’t married to into their former home with HIS children… It really is ALL about Jack, ALL of the time, don’t you know?

And wouldn’t he be FURIOUS to find out that Carly had his children calling one of her lovers ‘uncle’?  Well, in this case, Liberty would be calling her mother’s boyfriend ‘uncle’, and she’d since he his her father’s brother… well, I was going to say that it wasn’t so creepy, but it is.   Oh those interchangeable Snyder boys!  They’re like a set of legos, pop one off, put another one on in its place – same difference.

Carly, in Janet’s shoes, would be the ‘whore of Oakdale’.  Carly would be the bad mother who put her lust for a man above her love for children, and her duty as a parent.   Not his Janet, no sir!  After mere months of knowing one another – most of that time spent by Janet trying break up his brother’s marriage, he and Janet are ready for the bliss of her living with him and attending to his needs.  “Lucky” girl.

Janet gets to fulfill the whims of he-of-the-goodness-and-light.  She gets to put her love for her child, and her duty as a parent, second to her lust for Jack – much to his delight.  While the double J’s (that’s jackasses, in my book) tell their children to slow down, sex is not a game, it’s worth the wait – they’ve betrayed everything they’re supposed to be teaching their children by rushing into a sexual relationship and then rushing into the idea of living together.

Way to go on teaching by example, Double J.  You’re model parents, assuming that every other parent in town mysteriously disappears.  Are they the worst of soap humanity?  No, just the most annoying and the absolutely most hypocritical – which, as you can see, only increases their standing as the most annoying.

Adding the Liberty/Parker/Rape Allegation storyline on top of the Double J mess only serves to exceed my pain threshold for this couple.  Janet is already SURE of Parker’s guilt. Jack, surprisingly, is not and will investigate the matter.  Oh yes, surprisingly, because Jack hasn’t had much interest in being a real father these days.  He’s too busy fabricating a make-believe relationship with Janet. 

(As an aside, clearly Liberty was drugged.  WTG, WT writers.  You’ve just finished a storyline focusing on the drugging of an entire family – you’re going to top that with the drugging of a teenaged girl and a alleged rape storyline?  That, for me, explains Jack’s insane obsession with falling in lust with another anti-Carly who is more trouble than the original.  Second verse same as the first?) 

I find myself feeling pretty lucky to have been born in such a miraculous, technological age. In fact, it’s what will save me from suffering the perils of watching double J sink this show into oblivion and it’s something that’s been around for many years now… it’s called a ‘remote’.  I have not one, but TWO options when it comes to avoiding this couple. I can Fast Forward any scenes I’ve foolishly recorded OR I can simply change the channel if I choose to watch live (and these days, folks, friends don’t let friends watch daytime live! One of you will have to remind me to record the show and save myself the frustration!)

As I read the show, Luke and Noah’s relationship, Emily and Margo’s battles – Casey and Tom’s attempts at peacemaking, have generated more interest and positive dicussion than all of Double J’s soiling of every inch of the Snyder farm.  OF COURSE, it makes sense that all of the above would get less screen time.  In the end, all is not as bad as it seems.  The double Js will either soon be a very bad memory, or a blur on my television screen.  It’s all good.

Daytime’s Parenting Sweepstakes (Updated)

Bold and Beautiful.  Who’s the bigger loser in the deal, Marcus or Donna?  My money is on Marcus.  WOOHOO, you find your biological mother and she’s a former model, rich as creases, and now in charge of a multimillion dollar conglomerate.  What’s not to love?  Oh, just the fact that she’s nutty as a fruitcake (see Forrester Creations ‘takeover attempt’).  Not enough?  Add that she’s dumb as a stone!  How is it that young Marcus knows enough to be suspicious of Owen and Donna is falling for his act hook, line, and sinker?

If Donna loved her ‘honeybear’ as much as she claims, or her son for that matter, Owen would have been out the door.

All My Children – JR and Adam.  Adam is on the losing side, in this case.  Just how many times can JR turn his back on his father and try to make Adam ‘pay’ for (insert incident)?  His attempts to take over Adam’s company and/or fortune are becoming as commonplace as his change in hairstyles. 

He can forgive Babe for every mean and nasty thing she’s done to him, including having one night stands just weeks after they were married, and running off with his child AND his brother, but Adam is the devil incarnate?  What AMC needs is MORE Adam, and even an Adam clone or two (hint there, JR).  Given what’s transpired on this show the past couple of years, Adam is the least threatening person in Pine Valley… so far…but give him time.

One LIfe To Live – Starr and Todd.  It’s a draw!  The mini-me Starr has become is absolutely intolerable to me.  She’s demanding, obnoxious and completely out of control.  I hate it women, in general, are blamed for their children’s behavior, but I think it works in Starr’s specific case.  Blair shares some of the blame.  Carrying Todd Manning’s genes set Starr up for a very difficult life, to begin with – but there was a least some chance of escaping her destiny to make life miserable for as many people as possible.  Blair hasn’t done Starr any favors by having little-to-no guidelines for developing a sense of self control. 

While Todd moves to one extreme, appointing himself Starr’s Lord and Master, Blair moves too far in the other extreme – wanting to be Starr’s best friend.  Hey, Blair, Starr has enough ‘friends’ – they helped get her in the situation she’s in now.  She could use a parent.  She’s sorely lacking one.  While Starr is working hard trying to place her child for adoption, she should be looking for a placement of her own.  Make sure to take Jack and Sam with you, kid!

As The World Turns – Puberty (Parker and Liberty).  Isn’t it grand that their parents have FINALLY figured out that these kids need supervision, AFTER they were caught in bed together?  Before that?  The only parent who made time for either of them, and tried to keep them in line was Liberty’s father, Brad.   Brad is a lone salmon swimming upstream, when it comes to parenting.  He actually focuses on his daughter more than his own sex life.  Imagine that! 

Oh that Carly and Holden, and Jack and Janet.  Theirs are the ‘F’ bombs that just keep giving and taking.  They get their freak on and their 16 year olds get their freak on in response!  Ain’t that grand?  Summer love never seemed so  backwards.  Well, we know the outcome for OLTL’s  Starr and Cole – a child she wants to give up for adoption, one he wants to keep and raise.  The problem is that the OLTL storyline is weak, and without much merit as an example of the difficulty of teen pregnancy ( read more in the blog below “Jumping the Shark”).  All of the issues that make the OLTL storyline a weak one are issues that make a strong case for a teen pregnancy storyline for ATWT’s lusting cousins, ‘Puberty’.   

Both kids are from families that are hardworking, middle class (lower middle, or upper lower for Liberty and her mother, Janet).  Raising a child WOULD be a struggle for Puberty, neither of which has a trust fund, slew of servants, or enormous mansions to raise their child in.  Both are teens who rushed into sex, even while using birth control that neither probably knew how to use adequately or responsibly enough to be protected. 

There was no emotional commitment between Parker and Liberty prior to having sex.  Would they want to raise a child together?   This pair would give a more realistic look at the emotional angst of having made a decision they weren’t ready for and the angst of dealing with loivng a child enough to give it a great home with parents who were ready to love and care for it.  I’d hate for a Puberty pregnancy storyline (if there was one) to become as sensationalized as Gwen’s pregnancy storyline.  I’d love to see daytime portray teen pregnancy realistically and with great deference to the hardships of real life teen parents.  Since this is daytime, and almost no storyline is offered without controversy, let me offer the following:

Parker could turn to cousin Luke to help him.  He’s not ready to be a father, and yet he’s not ready to see his child placed with strangers. At LEAST two options are now available.

1 – Luke decides to adopt his cousin’s child.  He talks it over with Noah, and Noah agrees to give him whatever help he can.  It leads to them spending more time together and getting even closer – even if they’re not ready to be a full-fledged family.  Can they survive Luke becoming a single father and splitting his time between their relationship and his son?

2 – Luke and Noah decide that they’re ready for a long term commitment and raise the child together, as a family.  They agree to adopt the Puberty baby together.  This storyline, by the way, pulls Luke and Noah out of the ‘late teen’ trap the writers have been keeping them in to avoid their emotional and physical connection – which now makes even less sense given the explicit and graphic Puberty romp. 

In either case, Luke/or Luke and Noah adopt the child, agree to help raise him, and end up fighting Janet  and Brad on the adoption.  Janet opposes for religious reasons.  Brad opposes because he wants custody of the child and plans to raise it with Katie.  Both Liberty and Janet thinks it’s too much to have the child raised as Liberty’s sibling and fight Brad.

What’s that, you ask?  Haven’t NUKE been through enough?  I get the point, and understand why it would be hard to watch another ‘anti’ storyline when it comes to these two, but I think a storyline about adoption could be a great way to address the issue of whether cultural ideas about adoption involving GLBT parents is more myth than reality.   This would be an opportunity for the writers to debunk myths and to open the discussion about the more than a half million children in this country who need homes, and are barred from living in the context of a family with same sex parents because of unfounded fears.

I think the writers have exhausted the focus on Luke and Noah as ‘good guys’ with hearts of gold.  I think they’ve done enough to show us the stereotypes about gay males are just stereotypes.  It’s time to move them into family mode.  It’s time to fully integrate these characters and give them a meaty storyline that isn’t just about ‘coming out’ and dealing with ‘being out’.  They’re out.  It’s time for them to become as real as any other character on canvas.

Update:  I’ve just been informed that Noah is roughly 20, Luke 19.  It wouldn’t make much of a difference to have Nuke become parents at such a young age instead of Puberty.  Too bad the writers haven’t SORASed them as they have so many others.  Nuke, mid 20s?  They’d make great parents.  It’s just a few short years away.