Why AMC scares me…

AMC scares me because I actually <gulp> LIKE the show!  After so long of not caring whether the show was on or not, something is happening, and it’s huge (for me at least):

1.  Ryan Lavery has long been the bane of my existence.  Since he dumped Kendall and married Greenlee that  first time, I’ve despised the character with a flaming hot passion — which then makes it odd that he’s so often left me feeling cold.  Each of his prior relationships has been about him being the ‘big man’ who rescues and saves  each woman deemed ‘lucky’ enough to share his bed.  With Madison it’s different.  Whatever it is she brings to the screen (a strength that the others didn’t have, less need for rescue, the ability to ‘speak loudly’ even when she doesn’t say a word), it’s working for this show, and for Ryan.  She makes him tolerable and  I actually want to see more of them together!

I hope Binks is wrong and that Ryan isn’t still in love with Greenlee, only that he’s convinced himself that he is.  It’s time to sink that ship for good.  CM’s Ryan sinks to the level of the woman he’s with most of the time – despite the fact that he’s supposed to be the ‘good guy’, the ‘guiding force’ leading immature women into adulthood.  With Greenlee (and Kendall, and Annie, and…) Ryan was equally immature, substituting obnoxious faux  righteousness for maturity.  With Madison he is open, and honest, and reflective.  I’d like to see more of that from Ryan.  I’d forgotten that I once liked the character, until this past week.

2.  David and Greenlee.  RB’s Greenlee has never been an interesting character to me – not one time EVER.  Sure, I know it’s soap blasphemy to not whorship La Budig’s spoiled ill-tempered Greens, I get it.  I just don’t get her appeal.  The closest she’s ever come to working as a character is her relationship with Leo.  So, it makes sense that as friends-  or more, she’d work with David.   Other than the difference in hair color and age, the brothers had a lot in common.  Of course, Leo was  reformed bad boy.  David is a bad boy who became an unapologetic bad man… and did I thank you for that writers?   Greenlee is, with David, who I’ve always seen her as – together they are a malicious and wicked good time.  Thank you, again, writers.

4.NuBianca… Why not double down?  I’m all about the soap blasphemy, today.  I LOVE NuBianca.  I love her for several reasons, the most important being that in this case a fresh face really does feel like a fresh start for the character.  ER’s Bianca was lovely, but after some time her Bianca became a bit pious and tiresome.  The writers worked too hard to make her a wide-eyed doe in need of protection no matter how many life experiences she’d had that should have toughened her up.   NuBianca really sells it.  Her confrontations with Greenlee/David over Erica and Fusion were priceless.  This time I was rooting for Bianca simply because she was Bianca and not just because it was Greens she was in battle with – she felt like a young girl battling soul swallowing behemoths.

5.  Erica and Jackson.  I don’t care what the time or location is, I think I’ll always root for Erica and Jackson.  I loved them when Jackson was in love with Erica even though she was married to his brother.  While Travis wanted the perfect politician’s wife (and who was he fooling other than himself?), Jackson wanted Erica -mind, body, and soul.  She didn’t have to ‘become’ the woman he could see himself living the rest of his life with – as Travis had.  He already knew she was perfect for him.

The writers are teasing fans with the prospect of a reunion between the pair – after a battle between Jack and Erica’s mountain man rescuer, Caleb I’m sure … or is either man meant  for Krystal… or should we expect a Krystal/Caleb/Erica/Jackson quadrangle? How will this work?  Krystal will want Jackson, who’ll want Erica, who’ll want Caleb?  And just who will Caleb want, in return?

Time will tell.  It’s back to the drawing board for me.  This storyline, and those mentioned above have me intrigued AMCers.   What about you?  What are you loving (or not loving so much) about AMC?

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AMC – It’s like she never left

I was on ‘Babe’ overload about ten minutes after the character arrived.  Every day after that was slow and painful torture.  I won’t say that I ‘celebrated’ her death, let me just say that I didn’t mourn the charcter’s passing and it was mere coincidence that I was eating chocolate and drinking my favorite tea during Babe’s death scenes. 

I thought I would finally get  MY AMC back, with Babe gone. That AMC characters spent MONTHS after the death of St. Babe trying to convince the audience that she was a gift from the soapgods raised my hackles, but I took it in stride.  St. Babe was DEAD, I wouldn’t have to worry about hearing her name for too much longer… or so I thought.

In walks  Shadow-of-Babe.  You know her as “Marissa”.  I think  of her as the bane of my existence.  It’s not the fault of the actress.  Brittany Allen is quite a find for AMC and would be a joy in any other role – for me at least.  The trouble stems from the fact that fans like me will now have to keep flipping the channel every time  we hear a new reference to ‘Babe’ or see Marissa’s face… And then there are the Babe related questions:  “Why was she chosen to stay?  Why did you love her and not me?  Was I not pretty enough?   Did I cry too much?” (Ok, I’ll admit I stuck around long enough to hear that little confrontation and almost felt bad for Marissa).  Outside of that one scene, I just don’t care to hear ANY of it. I don’t wnat to see an angry Marissa, or a young woman with low self-esteem because her twin was so beautiful, brilliant, and beloved… BULL.

I have no doubt that with these series of confrontations  between Shadow-of-Babe and Krystal, we’ll be asked to re-live the ‘Tales of Babe the Magnificent’.  We’ll have to hear on a daily basis how kind and loving she was.  Angels will sing and the heavens will open.  While that’s happening?  My belly will be sore from relieving itself of its contents.  My head will be sore knowing that there is no relief from this storyline. 

Maybe it’s already aired, I can’t tell you because I refuse to watch Shadow-of-Babe and Krystal, but it’s doubtful that Marissa will be treated to the “Tales of Babe the Loser’… the woman who had a one night stand in short order of coming home to her husband’s family, the woman who thought she might have been pregnant by her husband’s brother, the woman who knew she’d been raising her best friend’s child – a stolen child – and kept the secret, the woman who cheated though she’d been forgiven for cheating before… ARGH… Just typing that makes me want to throw shoes at the screen, again.

I just find it hard to believe that Krsystal missed Babe terribly, and never thought to tell anyone about Marissa.

I refuse to believe that she left Tad AND David in the dark.

I refuse to believe that the writers think that of all the AMC characters fans would care about if they returned (HUH HEM… Brooke English) that they believed that we would give a wit about yet ANOTHER child for David and Krystal.  Apparently, fans’ ferverent disgust over David and Krystal’s attempts to raise ‘Little A’ (David more than Krystal) looked more like ‘extreme interest’ to the writers so they decided up the ante and give them another  adult daughter -also  involved with JR.

There’s so much I WANT to see happen on AMC… Unfortunately, NONE of it will happen because the writers seem to have decided that killing Babe off was a mistake and they had to ‘start over’ with the Shadow-of-Babe.  What IS it with ABC soaps?  First Emily-Rebecca (Remily), now Babe-Marissa (Bissa)?  Could things get worse!??! (Yeah, rhetorical question… given what’s happening, I know that things CAN and WILL get worse).  At least this one isn’t an identical twin as in the Remily case.

Sorry writers but I can’t stick around waiting  for the other shoe to drop.  AMC is more OFF than ON my viewing schedule, for now at leastt.

4 words: Monkeys. Typewriters. Locked Rooms

You know the old writers’ insult, “Monkeys banging on typewriters could do a better job!” Imagine if you not only handed a room full of monkeys a set of typewriters (uh, keyboards), but you then locked them in. Well… that’s ONE way to force them to concentrate on completing your scripts, but watch out! Locking them in a room might add insult to injury and monkeys are pretty vengeful. They also have a pretty wicked sense of humor. Make sure you READ the scripts before you film and then air them for long suffering fans.

One Life to Live

Bitchy Marty, Bitchy Tea, Bitchy TeBessica… ‘effin.love.them.all.

Jessica apologizing and groveling at Natalie’s feet? No thanks. I felt sympathy for Nat “the outsider” for about 10 minutes. I’m over it. She’s still sleeping with the man who cost her sister’s husband his life. An accident? Sure… after months of deceiving him and destroying everything he’d built for his family. I’m hoping Tess and Bess have teamed up to finish taking Nat and Jared down – without plotting anyone’s death, by the way. Abject misery is enough for me, thanks. Tea taking guff from Blair? I don’t think so. Tea and Blair live different realities. Tea is a badass by nature. She’s shown tremendous growth and change and I love how spunky she is. Blair? Badass, on occasion, doormat more often than not. The woman slept with Spencer Truman just after Todd, the ‘great love’ of her life, was sentenced to execution. Despite every reasonable warning to the contrary, she made Truman a part of her children’s lives. My money is on Tea. Marty Saybrooke being left alone with Janet Ketring/Lee Halpern? Seriously, were the monkeys also STONED when they banged out that moment? Writers, keep an eye on the script monkeys, they’re making you look bad!

It’s annoying enough that Bo and Nora’s situational ethics drag every other living Llanview resident through the muck, but Bo and Tahlia leaving JK/LH alone with an angry and self-destructive Marty? The woman tried to force Todd to commit suicide for what he did to her (with JK/LH’s help). So they let her confront JK/LH, alone, wearing a coat which could very well have contained a weapon, and carrying an uzi sized purse? They actually LEFT the motel? I have to say, violence isn’t my thing, but I got a chuckle out of JK/LH cracking a vase over Talia’s head and taking off. Too bad Bo didn’t get one of those, as well! You’d think JK/LH was a witness for the defense  for as careless as they’ve been about her safety.  It must be nice to be pals with people like Bo and Nora. They use their offices to go after people you don’t like if you’re a friend, no matter how flimsy the evidence, nor the cost to the good folks of Llanview.

Oh, and locked-away-typewriter-banging monkeys? Less smug from Antonio and Nora, please. They’re on the side of RIGHT, and they leave me wanting to see Tea wipe the smug off of their faces – unless that’s what you wanted and then I feel played (well done). If I’m wrongfully faulting you and it’s the choices made by the actors, please speak to the director and ask him to handle it.

The Bold and The Beautiful

Bridget is a designer now? You magnificent vengeful monkeys, you! You really did get the last laugh, didn’t you? I wish I could laugh with you, but I can’t. It hurts. Did you have to pay the writers back at the viewers’ expense? An accelerated undergrad preMed program, supposed ‘years’ of study in medical school. Internships, Residency, saving lives, bringing babies into the world, bringing her aunt Katie back from the dead, saving her brother from jail following Phoebe’s death… and Bridget wants to give it all up to start designing for the company that just ripped off her father’s and brother’s newest collection. Bridget… giving up medicine for THAT!

She’s doodled haute couture  gowns for years and was just too afraid to tell anyone?  Her work is even better than life-long designer Clarke Garrison… stuff she sketched when not practicing medicine 23/6 and no one knew?  Uh, because despite the fact that EVERY one of her adult sibs, her nieces and nephew, and BOTH of her parents work in the fashion industry, she was too afraid to tell them she has a passion for fashion? Ok, works in your universe, but typewriter-banging-monkeys, if the writers don’t feed you, refuse to type out scripts on an empty stomach. It makes you a little loopy.

This wouldn’t hurt so bad if it weren’t a follow up to the “fabulous Paminis”… Pam Douglas, insta-designer with a CROCHET technique so secret that only Pam can churn out the one of a kind hot yarn bikinis… So what is Bridget’s Auntie Pam kicking out? 20 a day in the Forrester sweatshop? Monkeys, explain yourselves! Is there something in the air at FC that makes anyone who passes through the hallowed halls a genius in the design world (all except Clarke it seems)?

Guiding Light

Alan wanting revenge against a cheating Beth? I get that. For once in his life, Alan is as devoted as he’s ever has been to a woman, maybe the most faithful he’s ever been. (Beth hasn’t been faithful to anyone since she was a teen) She  gives birth to his child, while still raising his grandchildren and making him part of their lives.  Then she cheats on him. He now knows that he’s met his match in Beth.  No one loves Alan as much as he loves himself.  Ditto on Beth. He’s sleeping with his mirror image and it’s driving him mad, life is a cruel mistress, Alan.

I WANT Alan to make Beth miserable, and not for his sake, but because Beth is supremely selfish and sucks as a person. BUT…Alan grabbing the letter opener, TWICE (something TPTB aired when the scenes picked up with a third and fourth time during the next day’s episode, too)? Good mercy. Giving the audience the impression that he would just as soon plunge the opener into her heart because his heart was broken? YIKES!

I don’t remember Alan being violent with women, especially not to the point of contemplating a brutal death for one. He likes owning and controlling women, but he likes owning and controlling everyone. He usually shows more finesse. The old Alan would have had Coop arrested on some trumped up charge, claimed ‘Company’ for himself – leaving Buzz penniless, and set Beth up to think she was going crazy again just to get custody of Peyton. He would have done it all before lunch!  He actually would have kept Buzz on at the restaurant he stole from him and had Buzz SERVE him lunch. Alan is psychotic, but he’s no thug.

Monkeys, you owe the GL writers an apology for what you’ve done to their beloved Alan Spaulding. Shame on you.

All My Children

Zach. Killing Josh. Fathering Gabrielle. Eye-boinking with Reese. Expecting Kendall to understand. Vicious little typewriter-banging-monkeys… You’ve outdone yourselves. I actually like the potential fallout from this one. No criticism, here. This is all soapy goodness. AMC was lucky to have you on staff when you wrote that part of the plot. Kendall, forgive Binks, Reese, and Zach. PRICELESS!

While you’re at it, write that script where David Hayward is loving and unselfish, Adam Chandler has sworn off manipulating the people he loves, Erica Kane gives up designer clothes and all other perks of fine living, and JR Chandler stays sober! See how silly it all seems that anyone would expect forgiveness from Kendall? Whatever she does to them, they’ve got it coming. Maybe Zach should keep a picture of his happy parts in a safe location. The doctors will need it when they’re working on the reattachment and reconstruction!

I can’t give you a pass on Amanda’s pregnancy, however. Does anyone remember the last daytime pregnancy where the mother knew who her child’s father was (Binks excluded, of course) and there was no scandal around the pregnancy? (Whoops, Binks back in!) Why another contested paternity? It’s not like there’s been a shortage of them.

Then again, you’ve been writing for Annie and she’s freakin’ wonderful, so it all evens out in the wash!