You know you’re healthy backstage

when you can spoof yourself onscreen.  Thanks to the brilliant minds at the Bold and the Beautiful:

Check out more clips from the EyeOnFashion youtube channel, by clicking HERE If you check it out, you can pick up more videos like THIS:

Thank you, gods of the ‘shirtless hunks of daytime’.   Who needs eggnog?

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For pete’s sake – SET BRIDGE FREE!

Bold and Beautiful fans have waited… and waited… and waited… and waited… and waited <sigh> for the union of the show’s signature couple: Brooke Logan Forrester and Ridge Forester. Every soap has one: YnR’s Victor and Ashley… HA! Just kidding: Victor and Nikki, GH’s Luke and Laura, DAYS’ Bo and Hope, OLTL’s Viki and Clint… you get the picture. BnB fans haven’t just been waiting for Brooke and Ridge to get together, they’ve done that about once a year; fans have been waiting for them to get together and to get it RIGHT.

Brooke and Ridge have loved one another from the moment of the infamous ‘look’ , a look shared when she worked as a waitress for her mother’s catering firm- meeting Ridge for the first time on the night of his engagement party with the beautiful Caroline Spencer. Given the fact that their beginning was marred by bad timing, it’s no surprise that their relationship would be tumultuous at best. It’s a classic formula in daytime. Girl meets boy, boy is a pinhead, girl loves him anyway and they spend decades trying to make the relationship work.

We, the audience, buy it hook line and sinker! We watch as each partner inevitably makes one bad decision after another: Brooke refuses to leave Eric even though she loves Ridge and he threatens to move on with Taylor if she doesn’t. After finally getting together Ridge later rebounds with Taylor- proposes to her to ‘save’ his father’s marriage to Brooke after he see how lost Eric is without Brooke. Brooke becomes ‘friendly’ with Grant Chambers after Ridge fights tooth and nail to be with her – rejecting Taylor’s AND Lauren Fenmore’s affections for him, but again rebounding with Taylor when he mistakenly believed that Brooke was unfaithful with Grant (oh the irony).

I could write a novel based on the mistakes these two have made over the course of their lifetime of love. In fact, someone DID write a novel – ok a novel loosely based on the infamous BRidge relationship. It’s appropriately titled, Destiny’s Lady. Veteran BnB fans know that Ridge referred to Brooke as his ‘destiny’ in Lake Como, Italy. He commented that he could be with Taylor, and be happy with her, but that Brooke was the woman he belonged with, she was his destiny. That sentiment is echoed in a recent TV WEEK interview with Ronn Moss who says that Brooke and Ridge know that they belong together and they’re fighting to hang on to one another.

After more than 20 years real time, and more than thirty years soap time, it appears that BRidge is again being held hostage. They’re being used to help prop the flailing Steffy and Rick storyline, and it’s sinking the show and could sink BRidge in the process. What’s wrong with Steffy and Rick? If you’ve read this blog before you’ve read my take on the couple. It’s a pairing that NEVER had a chance at succeeding. I don’t fault the actors. They’ve given it their all. Kyle Lowder and Jacqueline McInnes Wood are STUNNING onscreen together and both do well portraying his borderline desperation to both love and use Steffy, and her immature attachment to Rick leading her to be completely blinded to his faults . If their characters were anything other than ‘family’ (biological or not) they most likely would have been a hightly successful pairing.

To some degree, I don’t fault the writers. The formula works (though not so much for this couple). Girl meets boy (not a major feat since they’re family). Girl falls for boy (after he’s involved in her twin sister’s death, and after he’s slept with and nearly married her mother). Boy is a pinhead (a little heavy on the pinhead behavior for this guy)… Assuming soaps have the time, I’m hoping the writers won’t spend decades trying to get us to buy into this couple. SICK, as fans have begun calling them, is an unrootable couple. There’s nothing even slightly engaging about them. They not only violate and pervert the notion of ‘family love’, they violate and do harm to everyone around them.

He betrayed the family business in order to be able to indulge his own desires.

She betrayed her dead sister and her parents’ grief.

He betrayed his mother’s trust and willingly hurts her if it achieves his agenda.

She betrayed the one man who loved her and treated her like a woman with a brain.

Both have been patently unlikable to the dismay of much of the BnB audience.

Rather than waste the historic, long-awaited, and finally solid BRidge union on trying to salvage Steffy and Rick, use BRidge to salvage this show! Brooke and Ridge have always been a youthful, vibrant, and passionate couple. For the show to appeal to viewers, they have to be that again. It’s taken more than 20 years to cause fans to lose hope that anything good will happen for the two of them. This period of time needs to be one of rebuilding them, taking what was magical about them (and is STILL magical) and letting them be that again. Have them step back and allow their adult children to live their own lives, while they move on to other things and focus on the care of their young children. The only deeply involved relationship I want either to have with any of their children over the age of 18 is for Brooke and Bridget to rebuild their relationship, as well.

— I’d rather see more of this couple in the boardroom, sometimes at odds with one another, sometimes standing together against others. Brooke and Ridge squaring off against Donna and Eric? Siblings Thorne and Felicia joining with their mother and aunt Pam to form yet a third FC faction? I don’t care what the corporate dispute is, I’d buy it… anything is better than having BRidge focus on the mess that Rick and Steffy have created.

But there’s still more the writers can do rebuild the BRidge:

— I’d rather see intrigue, maybe a return from Morgan DeWitt, whose obsession with Ridge is legendary but hardly spent. The last time we saw her, she was ‘thisclose’ to winning Ridge over… of course, he was amnesic and had no idea who she was, or where he was, but then again, who cares about the details in Morgan’s world? Morgan was a brilliant designer and has family money to boot. Why not have Morgan resurface with her OWN design firm to rival both Forrester Creations AND Jackie M?

Sadly, through Don Diamont’s most recent interview, Bill Spencer Jr. is being brought in to interact heavily with Donna Logan (makes me cry). What if Donna is a smokescreen? What if B.S jr is using her to keep the Forresters distracted while he brings Morgan back to town and helps her set up? He is supposed to be a diabolical and ruthless billionaire. We might find out that B.S.sr set the plan in motion, just before his death, and that BSjr feels that it’s important to follow through on his daddy’s dying wishes. Why? WHY would the Spencers still care?

1. Bill Spencer hated Ridge until the very end. He never forgave him for his treatment of Caroline, refusing to accept that Ridge was just a foolish young man at the time.

2. Bill Spencer (Sr.) is aware of Ridge’s dalliance with Mogan while married to Taylor – resulting in her pregnancy and leading BSsr. and Stephanie Forrester plotting to force Morgan to abort her child. Morgan would be the perfect pain in the ass for Ridge (and now for Brooke). She’d never come between them, but it wouldn’t stop her from trying.

3. Did I mention that BSsr has always hated Ridge?

I could see Brooke and Ridge taking on Morgan and Jr. to not only keep FC, but to hurt both of them – taking over Morgan’s design firm, making it their own. The writers could make it a ‘smart’ fight. Brooke and Ridge allow their antagonists to believe that they’re on the outs, staging public fights, Brooke throwing Ridge out of their home, but secretly they meet to develop a strategy for stopping the duo’s destructive plans for the Forresters. BSjr, happy at the thought that he has a shot with Brooke, believing she’s forgiven him for having used and dumped Donna, becomes vulnerable to her – just before she and Ridge lower the boom and take it all away from him, and his co-conspirator. As they move in and take over Morgan’s company, Thorne would finally have control of FC opening a friendly rivalry between FC and BRidge Designs. Felicia could go to work as the lead designer at BD.

It wouldn’t be the end of Morgan, or Bill Jr. She could move on to Jackie M’s… he could move on with Felicia. Oh those family dinners would be worth watching! Felicia trying to keep her love and brother from killing one another! The snarking, the snarking!

— OR Why not have Ridge and Brooke travel back to Portofino? It was the most beautiful location shoot EVER for this couple. While they’re there, Brooke and Ridge decide to trace his family origins. He barely had the opportunity to get to know Massimo. He knows nothing of the family Massimo left behind in Italy. Ridge becomes acquainted with his Marone kin.

While they’re there, it’s clear Brooke and Ridge are being watched and followed. It’s MASSIMO! He’s been in hiding, which is why no one has heard from him and why there has been no word of him taking back control of his company. Why is he in hiding? Is he in danger? Is someone trying to kill him? Are the old FBI charges being reinstated? Was he accused of a murder he didn’t commit? Whatever it is, Brooke and Ridge help Massimo. Bridget, who happens to be in Italy selling her designs for Jackie M to an overseas market, is there with Owen and Jackie, and they join BRidge in helping save Massimo’s hide… BRidge reconnects, the mother-daughter bond grows stronger, as well. Massimo and Jackie reunite. See? NO Rick and Steffy!

Whatever you do, writers, SET BRIDGE FREE. Give us a storyline that is solely about BRidge, not about their children, not about the people who want to break them up, not about the mistakes they made in not putting each other first. We’ve been there. We’ve done that. We have the lower ratings to prove it.

Non Dimenticar, BRidge fans! If you watched the Portofino shoot, you know why that song has special meaning!

Clearly, it’s the turkey talking…

I’m always giddy for about a week before the Thanksgiving holiday… mad with anticipation.  It happens every year and it’s the only thing I can think of that explains the fact that I loved daytime last week.  I can’t think of a thing I truly disliked.  I enjoyed most of what aired!  WOW!

The Young and the Restless – Poor deluded, insecure, Phyllis.  LOVED her reaction to Nick and Sharon’s closeness and that she made sure that everyone knew that she felt ‘thankful’ for a husband who made her feel “sexy”.  I LOVED that Sharon wasn’t at all affected by the possessive kiss Phyllis planted on Nick.  Loved  Nikki and Paul.   I get a little tingly watching them!  Daytime writers always receive huge kudos for remembering the show’s history and giving us a reason to cheer historic couple on.  Veteran viewers will remember the STD storyline  that ended the relationship between these characters when they were younger adults – opening the door to Victor and Nikki.  It’s an old storyline that still makes some cringe at the thought of the two of them getting together now.  I say, BIG DEAL.  Paul made mistakes when he was younger.  Look at the man he is now.  Victor never gave Nikki an STD, but he hasn’t given her much else, either.  Paul is so gentle, so sweet, and so caring.  It’s been a while since Nikki has had a man like Paul.  She’s so use to being treated like property that the tenderness she shares with Paul must be akin to a drowning woman being tossed a life raft.

Hey, it doesn’t hurt that Doug Davidson has grown sexier over time and brings a dignity and integrity to the character of Paul that makes me wonder what took writers so long to decide to make him a leading man, again. Better late than never, writers.  What a huge plus for veteran viewers like myself who aren’t as fond of new gang of unlikable leads – and you know who they are even if the writers don’t.  We get a character we’ve loved for a long time, in a surprising storyline that works.   Daytime writers are always patting themselves on the back for ‘taking chances’.  These are the sort of chances viewers want more of – playing with the show’s history and taking us somewhere we hadn’t expected to go.

One Life To Live – Erika Slezak has once again proven that she can take the very worst the writers throw at an audience and spin it into Emmy gold!  Breathing new life into Viki Lord Davidson, she almost, ALMOST, gave me a reason to feel sorry for Todd.  While that moment was fleeting, my complete and total awe of ES’s performance remains.  That Viki suggested that the only true escape from the Lord legacy was death made me gasp.  Viki’s expression of emotional and psychological exhaustion and devastation was probably the most amazing work anyone has done on this show in a while.  There are things best left forgotten, and there are those things too horrific to forget. The only option when you’re dealing with the latter is to do what you have to do to survive them.  To have the sexual assault of Viki revealed and brought to light again was painful for many viewers, I suspect.  As peeved as I still am at the writers for the Marty/Todd storyline, I have to admit that they’ve done a magnificent job laying out the case for viewing the Lord family in new perspective.  It doesn’t make me want to forgive Todd, but it does add a layer of tragedy to the storyline that I hadn’t considered before.

The Bold and The Beautiful: DELICIOUS!  I found myself wondering if the writers wanted us to view Eric as a man who is so pathetic that his children can’t help but play on his stupidity and his vanity.  It’s not just one son who is lying to and deceiving him, but TWO!  Rick has led him to believe that he was more seriously hurt than he actually was.  Thorne tricked him into believing that Donna was cheating on him.  I’m sure this storyline was supposed to be another ‘pity poor Donna’ attempt.  Sorry, writers, no dice.   That won’t happen.  Donna is irrelevant at this point.  So much of Eric’s life has been spent being pampered and catered to that his children knew exactly which buttons to push to make him dance to their tune.  How perfect is it that a man who has only been passingly acquainted with the term ‘fidelity’ demands and expects it from others?  My only real disappointment with this storyline is that Donna will probably end up crying on the ever willing Owen’s shoulder. Poor Budge will become Owen’s friend and confidante, when she should be the woman he falls in love with – but it would be too much to have the writers allow Bridget to be happy.

DAYS Of Our Lives – Nicole, Nicole, Nicole… Zuker was perfect, of course.  Just when you’re convinced that Nicole Walker is completely soulless, Zuker pulls out the most amazing performance and reminds you that Nicole’s rough and hard exterior only serves to protect her incredibly soft heart.  I just love this character.  I may not like what’s coming for our Nicole Walker Dimera, but Zuker makes me want to hang in there and watch just for the performances.  GO GET ‘EM, Nicole!

All My Children –  O… M… G!!!!  Annie?  YIKES!  I know it was Annie Lavery carrying that bloody knife and wedding bouquet, last week, but honest to goodness, I just kept seeing Richie’s face.  If only the residents of Pine Valley knew then what they know now.  I was sorry to see Annie sacrificed on the doomed altar of Ryan and the oft-fleeing Greenlee, but I’ll have to thank the writers for letting Annie go away with a bang, and not a whimper.  I had such a grand time watching Annie act out the last scenes of ‘Whatever Happened To Baby Jane?” that I almost didn’t care whose blood was on the knife.

General Hospital. I’ve long since lost my stomach for General Hospital, but I have to say that  I didn’t mind the show last week.  Sonny’s descent into madness… correction:  Sonny’s CURRENT/LATEST descent into madness has been oddly entertaining.  Like so many times before, Sonny has been loathed to take the counsel of anyone else, save Jason, and he’s even lost that.  Now his actions may cost Jason the one person he cares about above anyone else, his son.  I’ve been uber disgusted with Elizabeth’s character.  I’ve never been a Jason and Elizabeth fan and can’t imagine that I ever will be.  In part because being with Jason is such a betrayal of everything Elizabeth has been about in the past (not to mention that her lie of a relationship with Jason cost poor Lucky so much).  Liz was always quick to point out what a bad mother Carly was, that Carly kept putting her sons in danger by being with Sonny. Now?  She sees firsthand what a life with a mobster is worth.  Will the writers pull the wool back from Elizabeth’s eyes?  Will she stop pretending that when Jason kills it’s ‘holy’ and ‘noble’?  Will she wonder why she traded in a man who lives on the RIGHT side of the law for the man who clings to the wrong side of it?  NAH!  It wouldn’t be General Hospital if that happened, right?

BTW, if I didn’t love the Robin-Patrick pairing, I would be seriously considering rooting on an Elizabeth-Patrick pairing… er, how HAWT were they?

As The World Turns. Brian/Lucinda/Luke… Oh dear.  Luke, in the driver’s seat.  Watching Luke make Brian uncomfortable?  PRICELESS.  “Grabby Grandpa Bad Touch” will learn to keep his hand to himself.   As much as I hate the idea of Brian deceiving Lucinda, I love the idea of Luke making Brian sweat a little.  Brian lost any appeal as a sympathetic character (at least in the short term) the moment he tried to make Luke believe he was both drunk and delusional, that he (Luke) misinterpreted the kiss.  I have to say that I wasn’t too keen to watch this storyline play out.  I’m sitting on the edge of my seat now.  I still think the writers are going with a sexual harassment storyline with this one.  Brian, so deep in the closet that even HE doesn’t know where he is, sexually harasses young men – those who are often the least powerful.  When they call him on it, he faults them, tells them they’re imagining things, that he was only being a friend.  Oh Brian, you picked the wrong man, this time.  Luke (and Noah) willl probably be the people who expose his past.  This should be good.  Take him down, boys, make him sorry for being the sleaze he is… until Lawrence Lau eats the dialogue the writers hand him, does that thing he does oh so well, and makes us all fall in love with Brian and actually feel sorry for him…

What did YOU love about your favorite shows this past couple of weeks?

Checking for I.D. How old are you, again?

I’m sorry, BnB fans, but I’m pretty disgusted with the thought of daytime’s oldest swinging singles tease. I don’t give a fat rat’s happy backside about the tease with trudge (Taylor and Ridge…zzzzzzzzz)  and brICK (Brooke and nick… zzzzzzzzzz!)

The writers created several ‘test’ scenes with Ashley Jones’ Bridget and Brandon Beemer’s Owen last week and they were AMAZING.  Owen was fun and flirty FINALLY. He was with a woman who wouldn’t let him stick his tongue down her throat hours after meeting him.   His relationship with Donna has been tiring to watch  because it’s been a primarily physical relationship with so little emotional connection.  It’s what made Eric and Donna such a bore, as well.  Bridget was light, carefree, and gutsy during her lunch with Owen. She was relaxed for the first time in a long time.  There was an edge to both characters that left me wanting to see more.  So what have the writers offered, instead?

Midlife crises playing out all over screen. Hell, writers, I’m past all that!  Given the age of daytime’s audience, MOST of us have been through our own midlife crises.  We don’t want to see daytime characters, approaching fifty who don’t know that ‘Wife Swap’ is a television show, NOT a suggestion.  Bridget and Owen were remarkably fun and cute and yet the only thing heading toward the small screen is teasing for the sort of stuff that sent fans packing in the first place.

Can’t we have one couple that hasn’t slept with everyone in sight, without all the emotional baggage, and without half a dozen babies, or half a dozen misattributed babies, between them?

  • I’m not listening to Pat Benatar on cassette.
  • I’m no longer stunned at the sight of a DeLorean (well, yeah, I am, but because I can’t believe it’s possible for the car to still be around).
  • My hair has grown out.
  • No Michael Jackson videos.
  • Flashdance is just a bad memory
  • ‘Whatchoo talkin’ about, Willis’ no longer makes me laugh

So why do I feel like I’m being dragged back into the 80s – early 90s with each ‘new’ BnB storyline?  Brooke and prick, Ridge and Taylor?  No to Brooke and Nick you say?  I’m there with you, and don’t see it happening, especially not if Katherine Kelly Lang’s last interview with TV & Satellite Week is any indication:

Do you think this might lead Brooke back into Nick’s world romantically?

I think that seems to be where the writers are headed. They share a child and that is a very strong bond. Since, Brooke is mothering Jack, she is spending a lot of time with Nick and one thing could lead to another.

How do you feel about the fact that Brooke might get close to Nick who has just betrayed her daughter, Bridget?

See that’s the thing I want for Brooke. I want her to put her children first, much like Taylor does. I cannot imagine a woman even sharing the same room with a man who has cheated on her daughter but Brooke thinks with her heart and sometimes makes unwise choices because she leaps before she looks. The fact that there is a child involved now (Jack), does change things a lot too.

If you were to pick a man for Brooke to settle down with, whom would you pick?

Brooke has spent most of her life being in love with Ridge. I do not see any man replacing him in her heart. So, I would say Ridge but God only knows who she will be calling her destiny tomorrow.

If there is a storyline that you want to enact as Brooke, what would it be?

There’s so much that Brooke can do besides jumping from one relationship to another. Unfortunately, that is all she has been doing for years now and I am tiring of it. I mean she is nearing 50, has four beautiful children and is with the man she has wanted to be with all her life; so you would think she would settle down already. There are days when I read the script and groan because Brooke is supposed to be saying the exact opposite of what she just uttered a week back. There is no consistency at all. I would like some of that. A 180 change on a daily basis just leaves the character with no credibility.

It would be harder to watch Brooke return to Nick after he’s betrayed Bridget yet AGAIN.  This time around, he got her dying ‘best friend’/Aunt pregnant.  The guy didn’t let Bridget’s side of the bed get cold before he was back into it with her Aunt.   Bridget was smart to get out when she could.

The Unkindest Cut of All

Taylor, REALLY?  You’re going to blackmail Brooke, trade her your ex-husband for her son.  Rick Forrester is the only man who has ever loved Taylor and ONLY Taylor.  He’s the only man who has ever put her first and fought all others to defend her.  Rick is the only man who hasn’t treated Taylor like a stand by.  This is how she repays him?  She might remember that when she was drunk, destructive, and hopeless, Ridge told their son, Thomas, that Taylor’s problems weren’t any of his business any more.

Taylor nearly had a psychological breakdown trying to keep Ridge from Brooke when they were married.  Ridge left their marital bed to travel to find Brooke while she was in EUROPE, because he sensed that she needed him – and he shared no children with her at that time.  She wants to trade Rick for Ridge?  Will it happen?  it’s doubtful, but if it does, she’ll deserve every moment of unhappiness she gets.

By the way, writers, if you’re not going to use Rick, why not send him away and bring back Dante (recast if necessary) and give us Felicia and Dante, and a HAPPY Bridget and Owen?  Without them, I see myself fast forwarding the full half hour, or probably not bothering to tape the show. I love the BnB for caring for it’s vets and putting them onscreen.  Most shows’ writers and EPs seem to have forgotten that there were beloved characters rockin’ their respective shows before they even arrived.   Not the BnB!  Veterans reign supreme (for the most part).  Much of the time that’s a blessing.  There are times when it’s just a curse, and this is one of them.

You just can’t make this stuff up!

Wait, I’m wrong… you CAN!  First, Stephanie catches the woman who soiled her marital bed (Donna), fooling around with another man (Owen) – in their shared husband’s (Eric’s) house.  Donna is cheating in the very bed that Donna and Eric soiled… Um, YEAH, now that’s just all about the soapy goodness, right there!

So how do the writers top themselves?  (Oh, I KNOW, you’re probably thinking, ‘you just can’t top that’… HA!  When the BnB is naughty, it’s very VERY naughty!  It’s when it’s bad that it sucks… right now?  The show is oh so naughty!)

Click HERE!  Eric wakes up out of his coma, and without anyone knowing wheels himself down the hall and it now HIS turn to catch Owen and Donna in a dirty clinch.  Sometimes… I think the soapgods DO love soapfans.  More, writers, I want MORE!

Only a cheat like Donna could think that telling Eric that it’s not what it thinks, and that she cried over him, could make a difference.  That chippie is even more obscene than I thought.  I don’t know whose misery makes me giggle more, Donna’s or Eric’s.  Both are cheaters and both ended up getting a bit of a smackdown… Karma can be a bitch, it’s not just a cliche…  I thought soap moments like that were long dead.  I guess not!

Equally delicious?  The Forrester sibs bouncing Donna out on her ear, giving Owen the heave ho, along with her.  I’m sorry, but what kind of fool is Owen, exactly?  When a man catches you laying lips on his new bride, the last thing you want to do or say as a ‘defense’ is that his children have been trying to do her in from the moment he went under into his coma… Gee, that explains why you’re in his house, trying to sex up his wife in every bedroom in his house.  Shame on you Owen… NOW!  End the Owen-Donna mess and bring on Owen and Bridget!

OH, and if the writers would only resolve the baby Jack issue and get that kid back to its biological mother… Taylor?  Bridget?  ANYONE but Brooke!  Anything that binds Nick and Brooke is a BAD thing… it kills off the audience and kills off the show’s ratings.

Joined at the immoral hip

There’s self-serving, and then there’s the BnB’s Donna.  It takes gall to tell the man you’ve just cheated with that if your husband was awake from his coma, he’d be grateful that you were around to save her.  Sure, Eric would have thanked Owen for saving Donna from Pam’s attempted murder plot, but he’d have left it at that. He’d have never thanked Owen by taking him to bed.  He for SURE wouldn’t have thanked Owen for taking his wife to bed.

Everything about Eric and Donna’s relationship rang false from the beginning, but Donna’s actions with Owen, and comatose Eric’s reactions have only confirmed for me that the only connection they’ve ever had is the one they forged while naked.  Donna cried and prayed over Eric’s comatose body. His true wife (Stephanie) did as well.  His children did the same… NADA!  Donna falls into bed with another man and at that VERY moment Eric wakes up calling her name?  So very Eric.  He may not feel her pain, but he must have some sort of psychic connection with whatever gives her pleasure.  For those of you who named him ‘horny bear’ instead of ‘honey bear’.  You were dead on.

There’s self-serving, and then there’s GL’s Grady.  Set up your girlfriend’s ex, have him jailed, and then keep her close.  Why?  Because you ‘love’ her.  Well, that explains why he’s more willing to work as a prostitute than get a job.  Even worse?  He doesn’t think his new business venture involves his girlfriend.  Why should she have to know that he’s willing to sleeep with anyone who’ll pay the fee?  He did take her to dinner with the loot, after all.   Luckily, Olivia couldn’t go through with it.  Too bad, for her, that she was willing to pay him in the first place.  Anyone who’s ever read this blog or read a post I’ve written on any board knows that I’m no fan of Cassie’s.  I’m of the firm belief it would take a wooden stake and holy water to get rid of that character, and even THEN I’m not sure we’d be so lucky in getting rid of her.

So it means something when I say that Grady telling Cyrus to just sleep with Cassie and let that be it, as if she was nothing more than garbage, infuriated me.  If you kill a woman’s child, you might not want to treat her as if she’s not worth anything more than a good shag and then a good dumping.   Is it safe to say by extension, that given Grady’s actions, he doesn’t love or respect Daisy any more than he does Olivia, or Cassie?  Poor Daisy, foolish girl.  Now get off of my screen, PLEASE!

There’s self-serving and then there’s OLTL’s Blair and Todd.  What started out as an epic multilayer love story has me clutching my sides in pain and tearing out my hair.  Does anyone doubt that Blair is fooling herself into believing that she wants custody of Sam for the sake of loving him and caring about him?  Nothing gives Blair greater pleasure than sticking it to Todd. 

Nothing gives Todd greater pleasure than making everyone around him miserable.  Marty may not remember that Todd is the man who raised her.  She may not remember her own life as a therapist, but she knows enough to know that something is definitely wrong with Todd.  You can see it in her eyes.  She gets it, the guy isn’t stable.  Remember when Todd’s instability use to be fun?  Now?  It’s just creepy… emphasis on CREEPY.

Can I add to the ‘self-serving’ list the OLTL writers?  At this point, it’s CLEAR that far too many people know about Tess’ little secret for her plot to be successful.  Tess was never stupid in the past.  Is the audience to believe that Jess’ pregnancy is costing alter-Tess major IQ points?  Blair has seen her meeting with the electrician.  Nat, Tina, Jare, and now Bo all know about the guy, and that he’s been in the basement working behind a locked door.  Are we really to believe that if Jared comes up missing, no one will think to look downstairs?  At this point, not only has Tess become dumber, but I feel as though MY intelligence has been insulted as well.  I’d like to believe that the writers saved something special for this plot (hey, they pulled it out with the Mendorra storyline)… I’m just not that hopeful that lighting will strike twice – unless you’re Rex, Bo, and Gigi… and I just don’t want to talk about that time travel storyline again.

Oh well.  The writers started off strong with Tess’ return.  I only wish they’d found a way to stay that way.  Too much focus on the Starr-Cole fiasco, too much focus on time travel, and too little focus on Tess The Great.

Rooting for the Anti-Hero

There are so few TRUE villains left in daytime any more.  DOOL’s still has Stefano.  I’m sure the Cassadines are lurking the shadows of Port Chuckles, but TPTB of GH seem to have no use for them right now.  The same GH writers refuse to label Jason and Sonny “bad guys” and have instead treated them as ‘anti-heroes’.  Anti-heroes aren’t exactly ‘heroes’.  They’re often dark characters who fall just shy of this side of morality or legality, and often lack remorse.  Sometimes, during their dark times, they just happen to do something good, engage in an action that helps someone else.  Don’t thank them, or even acknowledge that they’ve done something decent or human.  You’ll only anger them.  

Today’s anti-heroes don’t have the same level of emotional depth or sheer intellect of yesterday’s soap villains, but they’re still FUN, when they’re not completely slimy.  The two anti-hero/bad boys who’ve left me totally captivated are

1.  The BnB’s Owen

2.  GL’s Billy Lewis

Owen… Who wouldn’t root for a character played by the uber delicious Brandon Beemer?  The man is seven kinds of sexy on his worst days, and he holds nothing back when onscreen and in character.  What makes Owen an anti-hero (at least so far) is that his seemingly self-serving actions actually seem to be benefiting  poor ridiculous Donna.  Her husband is in a coma.  She’s just ousted her stepchildren (one of whom in an ex-boyfriend, another an ex-fiance) from the family company.  Her sister has walked out on her and won’t help her run the company she’s taken over.  The fashion world thinks she’s a tart.  She’s a failed model with a reputation for being more of the ‘pole dancer’ than ‘private dancer’ type… well, you get the picture.

Owen has managed to make Donna feel good about herself.  Sure, Eric does too, but his praise for Donna stems from her complete adoration of him.  She makes HIM feel good.  She makes HIM happy.  She makes HIM feel young. She gives HIM all the sex he wants — hence the viagra-coma.  Eric rarely has anything to say to Donna that isn’t indirectly about him.  Owen, so she believes, sees her and believes in her ability to do anything  – accentuating the  point of how wonderful he thinks she is with a big sloppy kiss (take that  viagra-swilling, wife-dumping, comatose husband!).  Awww… very ‘Bridget Jones’.

Confused, frightened, and alone, Donna has no one to turn to but our Owen Knight – and he’s played a role in making sure of that!  Clearly the man has his own agenda.  Is his agenda  an anti-hero agenda in sticking it to what he sees as pampered and angry Forrester sibs who seem to want more than he thinks they’re entitled to?   OR is it an villain’s agenda, one that begins with convincing Donna that she deserves to run the company and ends with Owen either owning FC, or emptying Donna’s bank accounts.  While I SHOULD feel sorry for Donna, if I happens, I won’t.  

Anti-hero or villain, I’m anxiously awaiting Owen’s next move.

Bill Lewis.  Yes, Yes, he’s stolen a mansion and small fortune from Alan Spaulding, but let’s face it, Alan isn’t such a nice guy either.  It’s a classic anti-hero move.  The bad guy makes the even WORSE guy finally pay up for causing others misery.  I cheered on Lizzie (Alan’s granddaughter) and Bill as a couple.  Bill wasn’t trying to make Alan’s life even more miserable.  I cheered them on because it’s been a long time since GL has had a couple with the same cosmic chemistry as Reva and Jeffrey, Reva and Josh, Gus and Harley, Beth and Phillip, you name it.  Bill and Lizzie had it all, and then Bill threw it all away. 

Political ambition got the best of him and anti-heroine Ava gave him the opportunity to pimp a ‘ready made family’ as the picture perfect way to start his political career.  That Ava lied and told him the child she was carrying his, and neglected to tell him she’d visited a clinic to be inseminated?  Eh, minor detail.  That she was wrong, the insemination didn’t work and she was pregnant by a man with whom she’s had a continuing close “friendship”?  Ok, major detail, but not insurmountable.  So what?  It’s ‘HIS’ family, now.  That the child’s father is African-American and Bill is not?   Ok. NOW someone’s got some explainin’ to do!

If you’ve been watching GL this past week, you know that Bill still thinks of Remy’s son, Max, as ‘his’, and is unwilling to give him up to his biological father.  Besides, the governor is ok with it… and isn’t that all that matters?  Nothing will deter Bill from his run for office!  But here’s the problem.  Bill has decided that he and Ava should tell everyone that they couldn’t have  child on their own.  They used a clinic.  There was an ‘error’ at the clinic.  The clinic made a ‘mistake’.  That would explain the fact that the child is African-American/Biracial.  

I could believe that Bill really does love that child if the writers hadn’t chosen that language: “mistake”, “error” and adding that the govenor is “ok” with it.  MAN UP, you wanker!  If the writers want to continue to portray Bill as the ‘anti-hero’, slipping toward ‘decent man’, let him love Max and want him for the right reasons.  The writers have to realize that right now, he’s reading poorly with that incredibly insensitive dialogue.  It has the potential to move him into the ‘villain’ column pretty damned quickly.  To further move him to the ‘hero’/”good man” column, have him tell the truth.  There’s a novel idea!c Have him admit that he knew his wife was pregnant with a child that wasn’t his before they married and it didn’t matter.  He could then lie and claim that he married her out of love.  Can you imagine the press conference if he keeps up the clinic lie?

Reporters: 

  • Mr. Lewis, you say that you and your wife wanted a child and that you couldn’t have one on your own so you sought artificial insemination.  Yet, your wife was inseminated before you were engaged.  Had you decided to wait until it was clear she could carry a child before you decided to marry her?
  • Mr. Lewis, you were dating Lizzie Spaulding at the time your now-wife was being inseminated.  Why were you dating while creating a family with another woman? 
  • Are you still denying that the recently published photos of you and Lizzie Spaulding are innocent?
  • Which are we to believe, Mr. Lewis? 
  • Were you toying with Ms. Spaulding as part of your vendetta against her grandfather?
  • Which of your various stories do you want the voting public to believe, sir?
  • If you’re not honest about something like this, Mr. Lewis, how can the public trust you?

Let’s hope the writers pen such a conference for Bill Lewis.  I’d love to see Remy reunited with his son, and Ava (should the actress ever return- or if the character is recast!).  Little Max shouldn’t end up with someone who is content to tell the world he is a ‘mistake’ or ‘error’.  Max deserves better.