Ratings Shocker

Thanks to the hardworking folks at Soap Opera Network!  Click the SON link to read the full ratings report:

HH
1. Y&R 3.8/11 (same/+.1)
2. B&B 2.4/7 (same/-.2)
3. DAYS 2.3/7 (+.1/+.3)
4. AMC 2.2/7 (+.2/+.3)
5. GH 2.1/6 (-.1/same)
6. OLTL 2.0/6 (+.2/+.1)
7. ATWT 1.8/5 (same/-.2)

BnB writers’ fixation on making Nick Marone an obtuse goon,  who needs to defend and protect yet another woman other than his wife isn’t paying off.   Their equally tiresome  fixation on the continued attacks against the Logan women by Steffy, Stephanie, and Taylor isn’t paying off, either.  This show is artistically dead.  The only fun you can have with the BnB comes from a bottle:

Take a drink every time Steffy, Steph, or Taylor (the axis of “un-fun” soap evil) refers to herself as a ‘Forrester’ when NONE of them are.  Steffy is a Marone, by birth, using her criteria for who deserves to use the name.

Take a drink every time one of the axis of “un-fun” soap evil pretends that the ‘Logan women’ aren’t also Forresters – even if  two of ‘the Logans’ are MARRIED to Forrester men and Brooke is the mother of Forrester heirs.

Take a drink every time Nick falls plays hero for someone  other than Bridget after swearing his undying loyalty to her.

Take a drink every time Bridget has to be made to look like a scheming screaming shrew… just to try to make Nick’s actions seem ‘just’… yeah, poor Nick.

Take a drink if a Forrester male’s testicles ascends back into his body in the presence of Steffy, Stephanie, and Taylor.  Two drinks are in order if he does it soon after standing up to the axis and swears that it’s the ‘last time’ he’ll let her demean his wife.

Take a drink every time you thought to yourself that it was  better if BnB males just walked around shirtless and said nothing- they’re so damned useless, but at least they’re pretty to look at.

Take a drink every time a marriage is ruined inside of a year… two drinks if it’s ruined inside of six months.

Take a drink if Steffy calls a ‘Logan woman’ a whore… and then offers herself sexually to Bill to try to ‘win back’ her family’s company.

Take a drink every time one of the axis of un-fun soap evil refers to the ‘war’ between the Logans and the Forresters – even though the only people engaging in the one sided war is the ‘axis’.  The Logan women are living their lives, and have managed to get along well with everyone but Steffy, Stephanie, and Taylor.

Take a drink if Taylor stands in the background delivering a  smug grin, like a lap dog, while Stephanie berates the ‘Logan women’.

Take a drink (a double) if the Logan women stand there and take the insults the ex-Forrester coven throws at them and simply look exasperated at being called ‘whores’ yet again.

Take a drink if someone is killed off to create ‘big drama’ on this show.

Take a drink if someone is brought back from the dead to kill the drama on this show.

ANY of the above would result in long term treatment in substance abuse clinic.  ALL of the above together is a surefire way of developing a case of alcohol poisoning!   Friends don’t let friends watch the BnB and drink!

I don’t expect DAYS to take the BnB for long in the ratings, if it does at all.  I will, however, enjoy it while it lasts should it happen.  I think that soaps that are in tune with the audience and that are willing to step outside the box deserve to be recognized.  DAYS is a much better show, artistically, and has a great deal more to offer fans than the  BnB, in my opinion.

General Hospital?  Words fail me.  TPTB are apparently determined to ride the Mob train to the show’s final and bitter end.  Good luck with that.

One Life To Live?  Even when it sucks, it’s better than most of daytime’s top rated shows.  It’s the little show that can’t catch a break!  I’m glad to see the increase in viewers, but I’m still at a loss as to how AMC could possibly top OLTL in the ratings.

Daytime is a very odd genre.  Great shows like DAYS and OLTL are at the top and the bottom of the ratings pile (not that there’s too much difference in the ratings overall).  Artistically flailing shows like the YnR and the BnB are at the very top.  ATWT is hanging on by the seat of its pants and will soon be gone.

We live in curious times, soapfans!

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