There’s whoa and there’s WHOA!

Whoa!  Abe Carver is the new Mayor of Salem?  HELL YEAH!  Let the games begin.  Abe has always maintained his integrity as a police officer, but I have a feeling (no spoiler here) that Abe will find power as seductive, and corrupting, as the next man.  It’s time for the writers to open this character up.  Other than occasionally dropping in a briefly appearing family member for his wife to have an affair with, we still don’t know as much as we should about the man.  This could be the start of something magnificent for Abe.  A secret from his past comes back to haunt him?  All thanks to his father-in-law?  Seriously, writers, I’d pay you for that storyline.  I would – as long as you’re down with monopoly money!

WHOA!  Lexie Carver is the First Lady of Salem?  Hide the children, batten down the hatches, and pray good people of Salem… PRAY!  Any Dimera that gets that close to power also becomes increasingly more psychotic along the way… Gotta’ love the DAYS writers for that.  In an earlier blog I theorized that the writers would have Stefano extract his pound of flesh from Lexie once Abe took office.  Stefano is the obvious choice, but I wouldn’t mind having the writers surprise us and have EJ flex his DiMera muscle!  Torn between two loves and trying to fight off their father who is always scheming to steal custody of his and Nicole’s child could make a man desperate- Good luck, EJ, not that you’ll need it (hanky alert and spoiler if you haven’t already heard:  this is one baby that won’t make it… sad.  I was looking forward to an EJ/Nicole offspring.)

Then again, how likely is it that Abe will be in office long enough for either EJ or Stefano to blackmail Lexie into helping them?  Isn’t she overdue for an affair?  How long has she been faithful now, a year?   Lexie and ‘scandal’ are like twins.  Where one goes, the other follows!

Whoa! No shortage of romantic weddings on AMC?  Who are the wedding participants?

WHOA!  My money is on (and get this!)  Adam and Erica AND Reese and Bianca.  Reese and Bianca are the obvious, I think. They’re the only couple not swirling the drain right now.  Erica and Adam?  They’re my long shot favorite.  Sooner or later, J.R. WILL turn on Adam – it’s his history, it’s what he does.  J.R. turns on Adam as often as DAYS’ Lexie has an affair!  Given what Erica knows (and her fondness for Adam despite herself and despite his often loathsome behavior) Adam may need to marry to keep himself out of prison.

Whoa!  Fans have complained repeatedly about the ill treatment they’ve received at the hands of TPTB of daytime.

WHOA!  RogerD posting about Tom Casiello’s blog on “The Loss Soap Fans Don’t Know They’re Experiencing”  You’ve gotta read it, but first a warning:  If you’re already peeved about the fact that the more fans tell TPTB what they want,  the more they get the opposite in return, “The Loss” won’t make you feel any better.   You’re not crazy, it IS daytime, and seemingly only day time, that blows off its fans and seems to believe that fans are mindless drones, property of daytime, too busy drooling and dragging knuckles to figure out how to change the channel… how wrong they are.

WHOA!  The BnB writers know how to do ‘subtle’? Well geez, why not do subtle MORE OFTEN!?!?!?

Rick admits what we already knew, and what the writers have already admitted about Brooke and Ridge – the show has been centered on this couple from very early on:

Rick: I am, yes. Someone I’m hoping to lure into executive management. Steffy, come on. You gotta eat. (Laughs) besides, your dinner date ditched you.

Steffy: My dad didn’t ditch me. He had other plans, a better offer.

Rick: A better offer. And how does that make you feel?

Steffy: It was only dinner.

Rick: And how many is that now? Missed dinner dates and birthdays and graduations unattended. How was it for you growing up when my mother and your father decided that spending time together was more important than spending time with you?

Steffy: It was only dinner. We didn’t have any plans. He was already with brooke when I called.

Rick: He was with brooke? You see, steffy, we have more in common than you think.

Veteran viewers know that Ridge and Brooke spent MANY days and nights together, during BOTH partners’ many marriages/love affairs.  Ridge and Brooke have had the various ‘soul mate’ talks, have refused to give up ‘working’ with one another for the people they loved,a nd have fought tooth and nail to remain a part of one anothers’s lives, even when they hadn’t crossed the line.   Their affair was an emotional affair, instead of a sexual one.  Interesting… very subtle.

Bigger question about the writers, how long will they let Stephanie and Eric stay together this time?  Stephanie is truly the architect of her own misery, plotting with Rick against Ridge and Brooke knowing Eric wants them to be left alone.  Her liasion with Rick will end up costing her family a whole lot more… then again, add Eric to that mix.  Everyone who indulges Rick in his self-righteous behavior is only making things worse.

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Buh bye Daytime?

Goodness, I hope not.  I bitch about daytime… uh, A LOT, it’s what I do!  That doesn’t mean that I don’t love daytime – even when I’m crabbing about how much I hate it.  It’s like marriage, people!  Ok, so there are some things I don’t like.  All right, I lose perspective from time to time and the stuff that’s just good old fashioned storyline telling gets lost in the crappy stuff (case in point?  Grady, Guiding Light.  In another lifetime, I’d have loved some, not all, of his bad boy antics.  If it weren’t for the fact that he was a hitman-for-hire who’s never shown any real remorse, and has never had to pay for anything he’s done wrong I would have fallen madly in love with this character).

I don’t want daytime to go away.  I want daytime writers to remember what made the genre great and get us back to that time.  Yes, yes.. budget constraints make it hard for big storylines and make it hard to offer the old wonderful scenes of families and friends gathered in the same room for almost any occasion (geez, remember Ryan’s bar for the celebrations and the holidays)?

Don’t you miss the huge Christmas celebrations on the Bold and The Beautiful (though TPTB have given us a couple of great celebrations the last couple of years).

Remember the Nurses’ Ball on GH?

How about the Bauer BBQ?

The Hughes Family Fourth of July picnics?

We’ll probably never see big family scenes again (short of soap weddings and soap funerals), but maybe we’ll occasionally see scaled down versions – scenes along the lines of tense dinner parties:  Picture it, GH’s Jason and Liz/Lucky and Sam having dinner together, working out the details of a shared custody arrangement that allows Lucky to keep his sons.  Liz, giving Sam the evil eye, is making it clear to all but Jason that she’s not completely over Lucky.  Sam doesn’t notice that hypocriti-liz is giving her the eye, because she’s too busy staring into Jason’s empty but beautiful blue eyes.  Lucky is staring at Liz, who is still staring at Sam, and he’s wondering why her ovaries seem to only warm up to the bad boy seed.  He wonders if he’d either killed someone, or joined the mob, would HE be the biological father of one of her children?   Jason?  He’s staring at his navel lint, trying to figure out how many more children, with how many more women, he needs to create before he’s TRULY walked a mile in Sonny’s shoes.   What I wouldn’t give.

I don’t hate daytime.  I just want a little more.  A little more love.  A little more romance.  A little more laughter.  Daytime has become a dark and depression genre.  I don’t know if current storylines are simply more reflective of daytime writers’ mood, but if they are, the worst is yet to come.  I don’t think the writers  have bottomed out, soap fans!

BnB

  • The writers have made it clear that Eric is an asshat.  Stephanie AND Donna living with him until he can make up his mind?  Sure, as I said before, it’s a rehash of the Macy/Thorne/Caroline storyline.  It’s alsoan unnecessary storyline since the writers have already proven that Eric and Stephanie are kindred spirits.  He tapes Donna working on the men’s line with Owen.  Stephanie taped Brooke (Donna’s sister) in the lab working on ‘BeLIeF’ with Ridge.  Technology is a very bad thing in the hands of Ma and Pa Forrester…a very bad thing.  Can you imagine what sort of titles their dvd collection contains?
  • Add Phoebe’s impending death.
  • Rick’s mewling that no one should be happy because he’s no longer having sex with Taylor
  • Katie stealing her niece’s husband, sleeping with him after she pushed the two of them back together, and after her niece saved her life.
  • and Marcus being sent away (and for what purpose?  So that Uncle Rick can seduce Steffy to stick it to Ridge, again?  Nice, since Marcus thinks the world of his cousin)
  • Watching the BnB requires a boatload of Pepto… but it’s not the worst offender.  The show DOES score high marks with me for recreating some of BRidge’s best times (the romantic Malibu wedding, the black teddy seduction scenes, last year, the Nagano scenes from the winter ’98 Olympics).

Guiding Light

  • Reva’s high risk pregnancy
  • Grady intimidation and physical assault of half the female population of Springfield.  WHAT?  Has no one on the GL writing staff ever watched an episode of Buffy?
  • Daisy is getting dumber by the day
  • The frequent prison scenes featuring Rafe (um, where is Grandpa Alan?  Why are Alan and Grady walking free while Rafe sits behind bars? Grandpa’s got no visions of his son, so he has no need for his grandson?  Alan leaves Rafael to rot while he mentors Grady.)
  • Olivia’s health crises
  • Bill Lewis in a coma
  • Watching the Guiding Light requires a good stiff drink.  You’re cutting back on your alcohol consumption, you say?  EASY!  Take a drink for every happy character you see on screen.  That’ll keep you sober.

General Hospital

  • There’s a population control issue on GH.  Apparently, no one knows how to use the pill, or a condom, or any other birth control device.  Oh but what to do about the overcrowding in Port Chuckles?  I know!  Kill off the citizenry.  I think we’ve been down this road one too many times.
  • Forget ‘Joe the Plumber’, ‘Jared the Undertaker’ must be a BILLIONAIRE by now!  There’s no need to build more jails in Port Chuckles, very few people live long enough to make it to prison.
  • Don’t worry, you don’t have to be criminal to make the ‘population reduction’ list.  You just have to ‘be’ in PC.  Emily, Georgie, Michael (coma)…
  • Can we do something about the decor in Sonny’s home, as well as Zacchara household?  The only things missing from the current decor are coffins, crosses, and cobwebs!  Only the Cassadine castle should be that creepy.
  • If you’re watching GH, these days, might I recommend laughing gas?

Young and the Restless

  • Phyllis is flipping her gourd because her husband is cheating emotionally (ok, that one gives me a giggle)
  • Victor is being framed by his son who is in cahoots with Jack Abbott, on top of being wanted for murder.
  • Everyone thinks Kay Chancellor is dead (do think it’s odd that the man who believes she’s ‘Marge’ knows who Victor Newman is, but is clueless about Kay Chancellor and Kay’s death doesn’t seem to be big news).
  • John Abbott’s ghost is still floating around.
  • Gloria is celebrating having duped an ailing woman out of a chunk of stock
  • Nikki is in mourning because of the loss of Katherine and Victor’s reappearance (ok, I made the last part up)
  • Cane and Lily are long in the face over their separation (and admittedly, their very existence causes ME to go long in the face)
  • The YnR is not quite as bad as others… relying on denial will get you through the down moments in the YnR.   There aren’t all that many down spots in the show.  In fact, I think the YnR is the most watchable show on the air, right now.

One Life To Live

  • Blair, today: “A toddler who needs sleep, a child who is upset over not seeing his father in long time and a teenager whose baby has just died’.  OY.
  • Todd was intimate with the woman he raped when they were younger- taking advantage of her amnesia.  He ‘took’ her when the man who was holding her hostage was murdered.
  • Jared and Natalie are recovering from nearly being blown to hell.
  • Jessica/Tess/Bess are battling for control of ‘the being’.  GREAT!  Scenes of a caged Jess in a dark room, with angry Viki photos around her cage.
  • Bess has stolen Starr’s baby to exchange with “their” dead child.
  • Marcie is grieving and Michael is trying to decide whether (and then HOW) to help her.
  • John… well, he’s still John
  • You need a prescription for anti-depressants to watch One Life To Live.

Great for killing a good mood if happiness just isn’t your thing:

  • ATWT:  Step-Grandpa Brian put the moves on Luke, and then tried to make Luke think he was crazy by denying what happened.  I miss Nuke.
  • DOOL:  Nick was arrested and led away in handcuffs, today… yes, dear sweet wonderful Nick.  All because of two characters I couldn’t give a flip about: Trent and Melanie.
  • AMC: Lovin’ AMC, but I don’t know how much more Babe fixation I can take.  Admittedly, she wasn’t one of my favorite characters so watching a good part of the show being centered around the aftermath of her death is painful… weally weally painful.

Let’s hope daytime writers cheer up… SOON!  I’m not ready to lose what’s left of the genre.

A Bridge Too Far

What makes even the worst daytime villains sympathetic is that the writers allow them just that ONE moment of humanity. The writers allow you just a brief glimpse of what the character could have been under different circumstances. It’s GL’s Roger Thorpe who cried when he was alone when he couldn’t stop the self inflicted pain of loving Holly- knowing he had no right to love her. He raped her and no matter how truly remorseful he was, it was an act that could never be undone.

It’s anti-hero figures like GH’s Luke Spencer who realizes that he’s spent too much time denying the reality that he needs love as much as any other person. He slowly allows himself to stop running from the people who love him and admits, even indirectly, that he loves them too.

As much as I think that love triangles have run their course in daytime, I’d hate them a lot less if the writers would give us realistic ones. Of COURSE As The World Turns writers can only sell Jack and Janet as a couple by turning Janet into a superwoman and Carly into a superclueless sinner – making poor Jack and poor Janet miserable. All I can say is poor me… and poor you…and poor daytime.

BnB’s Brooke Logan use to be the sole sinner in the daytime universe. It looks like the ATWT writers are going to make sure that Brooke has company.

Neither woman is allowed to be happy or be right about anything for long. Oh writers. While Carly hisses and snarls at Janet, Janet tells Jack and Tom that she’s worried about Carly and doesn’t want her to lose her children. St. Janet… sinner Carly…yeah, bite me.

Love Triangles – When Grandma/Grandpa goes wild!

Remember this:

Bad Day?  Your mother sleeps with the man you love.

Worse Day?  Your GRANDMOTHER sleeps with the man you love (Chelsea Brady, Days of Our Lives).  It sucks to have a hot grandmother, doesn’t it:?  Kate Roberts has never been the type to sit home and bake cookies.

Just be glad that… he didn’t sleep with your great-grandmother.  Dude, you just can’t live something like THAT down.

In the never ending quest to shock daytime viewers, daytime writers are riding the rails, folks!  It began with The Bold and The Beautiful.  The writers had originally planned for Eric Forrester to fall for Caitlin Ramirez,  the young woman his 16 year old had a crush on (btw, the grandson gained two years FAST, in the time the writers started planning the storyline).  We saw the lead in, Caitlin fawning over Eric’s talent as a designer – Eric, being flattered by the young girl.

Fans cried foul, and to the writers credit, they dropped the storyline.  It’s more likely the case that the actor cried foul and had more influence than the fans.  Either way, it died a quick death and daytime was all the better for it.

Days of Our Lives picked up the grandchild-grandparent relationship and ran with it.  Chelsea lost her hot Doc Daniel, to Grandma Kate.  It was a stunning reversal of daytime fortune in which mature women are typically dumped for younger vixens.  Still, it was a little creepy that a grandmother and granddaughter were competing for the same lover.

As The World Turns is taking the storyline one step further.  They’ve thrown a marriage into the mix – and this time, Grandma is ill, having lost the will to live because of the return of the breast cancer she thought she’d beaten the first time around!

At this time, it appears that Brian will share a kiss with a drunk and vulnerable Luke on the same night that he (Brian) marries Lucinda to give her the will to live.  Pssst… writers… seriously… WHAT?  What’s the point of that?  Throwing in Lucy’s cancer only adds fuel to the fire of a child/grandchild betraying a parent/grandparent.  That’s just one step too far.   Without Lucy’s illness, it would be one more storyline in a chain of storylines in which a child has betrayed a parent, intentionally or not.

There’s some precedent for a betrayal by a child (in this case grandchild) being forgiven – with the relationship moving forward successfully.  I’m not aware of any that have survived the betrayal of a ill loved one. There was GL’s Holly (mom)/Blake (daughter)/Ross (shared lover). Blake ended up married to Ross and they eventually had a family. Blake and Ross became one of the show’s supercouples. Holly wasn’t ill, of course.  Just angry.

Why couldn’t the writers simply create a love triangle that focuses on Luke and Noah, without the drama of an ill loved one?   I wrote this earlier, as well:

This kid is as rich as creases. He could fund his own gay film series and end up throwing enough cash around to have the university administration kissing his toes trying to get a small portion of his fortune.  Gimme more, writers, gimme more.

What would happen if Luke suddenly started behaving like the mogul he is?  What if his Lucinda gene (yeah, yeah, no biological tie) kicked in?  How would Noah react to the ‘new’ Luke?  What would happen if another young man from a powerful family came along and tried to woo Luke away from Noah? Noah, the kind and loving, up against an rich and devious snot how has images of merged fortunes dancing in his head?  Ruh roh!

Instead, we get a relationship that’s almost doomed to fail, and writers who’ll have an audience to ‘blame’ instead of a lack of foresight into how an audience would react to Brian and Luke’s kiss.  My hope is that Luke  (or Noah) destroys Brian for betraying Lucinda, the one person who’s loved him unconditionally.

IF Luke becomes so disgusted by this guy that he can’t stand the sight of him, and if Brian harassing Luke leads to Noah and Luke growing stronger, I could easily understand the value of the storyline. Maybe this is the thing that helps Nuke realize how much they really love one another and to move them to the next stage of their relationship.  Otherwise, I don’t know what will happen with the Luke and Brian.

There’s a tiny part of me that sees it as an act of cowardice, that it’s almost as if the writers want it to fail and would love to have the audience to blame for it, if ‘Lion’  (the name given to a possible Brian-Luke relationship) is rejected. I just don’t know what would make the writers believe this storyline would work.  If you have any idea, let me know.

The thing I’m MOST afraid of?  That this will become the new hot trend in daytime.  What’s next?  GL’s Daisy decides to kill two birds with one stone and go after Josh to pay back her mother AND grandmother (both of them having been involved with Josh before).  Oh, it could happen, soap fans, it could happen.

Dear Jack…

By the time you read this letter, I’ll be gone.  I’m returning to my one and only true love, Nicholas Newman.  Jack, please, understand that it’s not that I didn’t love you, I did.   You have been kind to me and loved me in ways I never thought any other man would.  You were an unexpected, and much needed, surprise in my life.

You were there for me when I needed someone most, and for that I’ll be forever grateful.  The problem is that I now realize that I still have feelings for my ex-husband.  It’s not you, Jack, it’s me.  There is a part of me that will always remember what we had.  We’ll always have Paris (oops… sorry!)

You don’t know how much it grieves me to break your heart the way ‘that woman’ did, the one you married before me.  I’m a better woman than that, and yet I’ve still hurt you.  Please know that it wasn’t intentional and if there was a way for me to split myself in two, I would.  I will always wonder if we would have made it, had Nick not come back into my life.

The problem is that  I just can’t live a lie any more – we both deserve better than that, most especially you.  I wish you well and hope you find someone who loves you the way you deserve to be loved.  I’ll have my things picked up in the morning and delivered to the Newman Ranch.

Love Sharon.

Any bets on how long it will be before good ole’ Jack receives a letter similar to the one above?  He’s already asking Sharon if he’ll always come in second to Nick.  That he HAD to ask the question should have been his first clue.  Jack use to be smarter than that.  The writers made Jack a little ‘soft’ when they turned him into the model husband.  Where is the Jack of old, the guy who knew a lie when he heard it because he’d told so many of his own?  I’m all for growth in characters but there are times when I’ like a little more of the characters I once knew.

I’m ready for the return of Nick and Sharon and Jack and the she-devil (you call her Phyllis!).  Writers, if you want to make me a very happy girl, please put the cherry on the sundae and make that child Jack’s daughter.  Somehow it seems fitting that the man who delivered her, and who wanted to be her father more than anything in the world actually is.

If you were here with me…

I would have to ask you to turn away as I said this.  Imagine my eyes, cast downward, my voice low and timid as I felt the need to confess to you the following:

Yes, they ALMOST got me.  The Bold and the Beautiful ALMOST drew me in and made me believe in Brooke and Ridge again.  Sure, they still have incredibly hot magic.  They are still the show’s perennial favorites, the only supercouple that’s ever made sense.  The use of the BnB’s most romantic wedding ever, the Malibu wedding?  It’s probably the most brilliant move the show has made in a LONG time.  Love or hate them, no one can forget the fairytale magic of the Malibu wedding.  The writers have been able to do one thing, convincingly, recreate some of the most special moments in BRidge history.  Remember this one:

What made the Malibu wedding so special to me is that it came at a time when Ridge and Brooke faced what they thought would be the worst of all life could throw at them.  How naive they were – how naive we all were.  Life – in the form of sadistic writers, had so many more cruel twists and turns to throw at them (more Taylor, nUTaylor in the form of Nick Marone,  Brooke’s brutal rape at Andy’s hands, Nick violating Brooke at the foundry, Stephanie, Massimo, Rick, and the list goes on).

Again we see just how emotionally connected Brooke and Ridge are.  We’ve seen it numerous times before, most notably when Ridge left his wife and children behind in L.A. while he flew off to Paris to help Brooke, sensing that she needed him.  Now?  They end up at the same time, at the same place, on the beach in Malibu.

By the way, isn’t it curious to hear Rick talk about how there’s no such thing as ‘forever’ with Ridge?  When will someone ask Rick who he’s pledged ‘forever’ to, and meant it?  EH!  Why waste time on Rick and his insane fixation on Ridge?  His whining about being dumped and faulting someone other than himself for getting involved with Taylor?  Back to BRidge:

If you missed the episode you say?  Click here to check out the Return to Malibu.

Oh yes, the dirty rotten bait-and-switch writing team of the BnB ALMOST pulled me in.  They ALMOST made me believe that they could and would finally let Ridge and Brooke be adults and stand together battling anything and anyone who dared to try to come between them … ALMOST.  Fool me once, shame on you, fool me for more than 20 years and I realize I need my head examined!

For those of you who still believe, more power to ya’!  My thoughts are with you and I hope you get what you want.  I’ll continue sitting here, on the sidelines, not expecting much from the BnB’s powers that be.  It’s safer that way.

BTW, my pick for classic daytime couples who remind us of romance use to mean, what daytime was once all about?

1.  THe BnB’s Brooke and Ridge

2.  DOOL’s Bo and Hope

3.  GL’s Reva and Josh

4.  YnR’s Nikki and Victor

5.  AMC’s Jesse and Angie

6.  OLTL’s Vicki and Clint

7.  ATWT’s Kim and Bob

8.  ATWT’s Tom and Margo

9. GH’s Luke and Laura (though they’re a sentimental fave and I could just as easily love Luke and Tracy)

10.  AMC’s Erica and Jack.

The newer generation of couples (Zach and Kendall, Luke and Noah, Robin and Patrick, Taylor and Jake, Katie and Brad, Nicole and Ej, Reese and Bianca, and many others are wonderful, but I miss old school romance with the couples I’ve known for decades).   If only if daytime writers could figure out how to give us BOTH, old school romance and the new schoolers.  They seem to be quick to sacrifice the veteran couples we’ve loved for the sake of giving us something we don’t want… more illicit sex between partners (Brooke and Nick) than a deep abiding love between the partners we loved (Brooke and Ridge).  Sigh…

Maybe this time will be different, ya’ think?  I’ll leave it to you to let me know, I think I may sit this one out.