Lord help the mister…

who comes between me my sister,

and lord help the sister,

who comes between me and my man!

The Bold and the Beautiful, One Life to Live, Guiding Light, and As The World Turns.  What do they have in common?  Vengeance and betrayal – fanfreakintastic!

The Bold and The Beautiful – Felicia Forrester has been one of the most sexually liberated and unapologetic women in daytime.  She doesn’t boast about her sexual conquests, much, but she doesn’t shy away from them either.  How many soap vixens remember, as fond times, dancing on tables in nightclubs while continent hopping?  Even still it’s not hard to believe that she’d have a hard time accepting a woman who seduced her brother AND her father in the same ‘little kitty’ lingerie.  Sex is recreational for Felicia.  It’s a weapon in Donna’s hands.   I get it, but c’mon, Felicia, you think Donna is a golddigging tramp on top of everything else?  You’re setting her up to be unfaithful to your father and then plan to hit him with the evidence of her infidelity?  Evil, pure evil.  Remind me to send a Christmas card to the writers! 

Is she a hypocrite?  Well, yeah she is but this is daytime, who isn’t? It will be interesting to see what Owen has up his sleeves – other than finely sculpted, beautifully toned arms.  My guess is that he chickens out now, and ends up falling for Donna and sleeping with her, later. Oh sweet irony.  It’ll be when he genuinely feels something for Donna that he’ll end up costing her everything.  Either way, Felicia takes Donna down, and I can’t say that I’m unhappy about it.  I am a little freaked out that Felicia feels that it’s her duty to reunite her aging parents (see the live blog of today’s BnB that follows this blog).

One Life to Live –  Tess is truly a “take no prisoners” character, D.I.D. aside.  She prefers to kill them off instead.  OUCH! Clearly nothing is left of the sainted Jessica.  She would never have allowed Tess to cut the brakes on Natalie’s car.  It’s that Tess showed no concern for Viki after finding out that she’d climbed into Nat’s car  that was even more frightening than the first time Tess appeared.  Does anyone else remember how early Tess rolled with glee on the kitchen table when Viki was carted off to the hospital – suffering from a heart attack?  THAT Tess is back.  Not only did she not show a moment’s concern for Viki’s safety, knowing that Viki is careening down the highway unable to stop the car, she immediately moved to ‘Plan B’. 

If she wasn’t going to get to enjoy learning that Natalie and Jared had died in a fiery crash as she planned, she’d take care of them another way.  She’d feed them a poisoined meal, all while waiting for Viki’s unlikely return.  How could they believe she’d so quickly forgiven them for killing her husband?

I take it back Felicia Forrester, you’re just a spoiled brat.  TESS is evil, or angry, or delusional, or all of the above.  She’s switched from grieving wife and mother to population control specialist in the matter of a couple of weeks.  Uh, scary!

Guiding Light – Will someone tell me why the writers think that it’s entertaining to watch teens with raging hormones turn on everything and everyone who’s ever loved them?  OLTL’s Starr Manning is tough enough to take.  Now GL’s “Daisy” is defending the man who killed her cousin, Tammy Winslow.  “G” was hired to ‘scare’ Tammy’s lover, Jonathan (who was also Tammy’s first cousin – don’t ask if you weren’t watching, I still can’t figure out all of the multiple connections).  Tammy pushed Jonathan out of the way and ended up losing her life.

GOOD NEWS!   It turns out that “G” is really, REALLY sorry.  Case closed.  Tammy’s already dead, so what’s the ‘diff’? (If your name is Daisy).  Sending “G” to prison won’t bring her back and besides, “G” makes her sooooooo feel good.   So far, emotional trainwreck that she is, Daisy has stolen food and money for “G”, is fighting with her grandmother, and has just walked away for her family for him.  She ‘find a place to live’ she says – as she’s visiting “G” in jail.  Just guessing, but he won’t be able to offer her the use of his cot.  Good luck there, Daisy.

If you’re not a Guiding Light viewer, then it won’t surprise you to learn that Daisy is lonely.  Her current boyfriend is on the run with her mother.  Her mother is protecting him from being prosecuted for shooting Springfield’s District Attorney.  Good times. Good times.  And great choices!  Methinks Daisy travels with her own Greek Chorus!

So… when writers SORAS characters, why can’t they skip the teen years?  Hells bells, I think most of us get enough teen drama and trauma at home.   Daisy, like Tess, has become a population control specialist, albeit in a slightly different manner.  She makes the case for using infallible birth control.  I never thought I’d say this, but it may not be a good idea for the Cooper clan to continue procreating.

As The World Turns –  Well, Carly fought the good fight – but Holden is a manwhore, dontcha’ know? (see blog below on “Daytime’s Greatest Manwhores”).  She had no choice but to give in.  That man was going to follow her to the ends of the earth to prove that fidelity is for the little people, HE is Holden Snyder.  This is the man who had an illicit affair in a Church bell tower, with the wife he’s CURRENTLY cheating on – when she was married to someone else.  The question is, how badly will Carly have to pay for this one?  Holden won’t pay. He rarely ever does.  Lily can be a bit of a dirty fighter when she wants to be so Carly may be in real trouble this time.

Lily fans will excoriate me when I say it, I’m sure, but if there’s to be bloodshed, I’m hoping it won’t be Carly’s!  Either Holden is going to have to pay the price, or Lily.  YES, I said it, LILY!   At some point Lily is going to have to ‘woman up’ and realize that she continues to return to a man whose pants are most likely held together by velcro to help enhance the ‘rip away’ effect when he tears off his pants with each new affair.

I’m not blaming the wife.  I’m blaming the couple – Holden AND Lily for playing out this tiring psychodrama year after year, partner after partner. 

EH!  Don’t get me wrong, I think Carly is behaving like a bit of a doof to allow Holden to put her in this position (fighting. urge. to. avoid. bad. pun.).   I only fault Carly for thinking she’ll be a ‘special mistress’ to Holden.  He’s a troubled, troubled man.  Each mistress is special, until the next one comes along.

By the way, honorable mention  for the ‘help the sister’ award goes to Margo Hughes!  I blogged about Margo’s behavior a few days ago but thought  that this is one case in which a picture truly is worth a thousand words – and possibly worth 25 to life.  When you seduce and become pregnant by Margo’s husband, you probably don’t want to make the foolish mistake of becoming sexually involved with her son just a few years later.  The woman is a cop and carries a gun, for pity’s sake!  If you are that stupid, Emily, don’t have sex with her son, in her home, AND get caught:

  

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